Someone in your community is currently isolated. The hard part is finding out who. Without going around door-to-door and asking, it’s difficult to know. However, I am writing this because there are people who know individuals that are in incredibly challenging, isolating circumstances. Yet, they do very little to help and, at worst, they do nothing at all. I am saddened to say as I write this, I am convicted of being in the same camp as those that I am challenging. This post is as much for me as for everyone else.
This hits home
I have personally watched this lack of help or complete radio silence play out over the years. I don’t believe people are aware of the impact it has or do it purposefully. Although the difficulties of not knowing what to do or say may mean they pull back. My sister has cerebral palsy and requires one-to-one care which is provided by my mum. Being a sibling in a family where additional needs is part of normal, everyday life for us, I have witnessed the strength, grace and peace of God working through our family unit. I’ve also seen the strain, struggle, and stress that accompanies the unique challenges of care with limited support.
It grieves and angers me that we live in a country with a social care system that is underfunded, where care staff are undervalued and underpaid, and unpaid carers are barely noticed. But what stings more is that local churches spend time in prayer meetings for the community, but cannot pick up the phone or pop over to check on and pray with caregivers on a regular basis. Or when retirement plans are presented as a time of ease to look forward to, or travel photographs are shared to a 24/7 carer with a smile. Do they not realise that the person who they are sharing their pursuits with has not had a proper break in years or decades, and retirement isn’t an option? The kind carer will often smile and show a genuine interest, and yes, they do care about the lives of others! But they are often mentally and physically exhausted with the day-to-day requirements of care.
There are, of course, faithful prayer intercessors that we know nothing about, praying to God on behalf of those in need. I often wonder what would happen if there was no one praying for these situations at all. Prayer warriors are an incredible, unseen blessing. It’s also important to note that there are faithful friends who journey with those who are struggling and alone. But when the going gets tough, or lives seem so busy and full, the isolated are often seen even less.
The body of Christ, the church, has forgotten some of its members. And they are worse off because of it (see 1 Corinthians 12:12-27).
Returning to our roots
Christianity started with believers who were of ‘one heart and soul’ and had ‘everything in common’. It’s hard to believe that there was ‘not a needy person among them’ because they ‘distributed to each as any had need’.
Now the full number of those who believed were of one heart and soul, and no one said that any of the things that belonged to him was his own, but they had everything in common. And with great power the apostles were giving their testimony to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and great grace was upon them all. There was not a needy person among them, for as many as were owners of lands or houses sold them and brought the proceeds of what was sold and laid it at the apostles’ feet, and it was distributed to each as any had need.
Acts 4:32-35
Can we be like that once again?
What would it look like if more Christians opened up their homes so carers could have a break, or those with additional needs were frequently and warmly welcomed in? Rather than empty rooms gathering dust and stuff, instead filled with radical welcome and practical support? Being the hands and feet of Jesus by allowing another’s hands and feet to have a complete break? Being willing to learn about the nitty-gritty of a care plan, and even to give it a go under the guidance of a family member? Family members often know more than the medical professionals because they they live and breathe care 24/7.
If that seems too radical, how about learning more about the situation that a family is in, and finding practical ways that you can help? Offer to come around regularly and spend time with carers. Offer respite or financial support. Not everyone has access to paid carers or the financial means to fund a proper break, respite accommodation, or funding for medical equipment.
We could all do with a listening ear, a sense of community, and prayer. But do not pray and leave them isolated. Check in. Check in. Check in. Seek God for how you can practically support them. Be bold and ask them what would help, and see if you could do it, or know someone who could help. Follow it up. Remember them continually in your own prayers.
Much of what churches offer are good, but it’s missing the mark for many isolated individuals. What is needed the most is relationship for the long-haul. A friend sticking closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24). It’s more than a foodbank. It’s more than a debt centre. It’s more than a community café. It’s more than a Bible study that many cannot access. It’s more than a course. It’s more than a self-help book. It’s more than a cup of tea once a month or once a year. It’s even more than an additional needs programme (as wonderful as these are).
It’s real, relational, roll-your-sleeves-up service to those that God brings into your path.
Moving forward in hope
There are many needs in the world. We cannot fix all the brokenness we see around us. But Jesus can; He can restore people through the power of His love displayed perfectly on the cross. He was broken for us. One day, when He returns and we meet Him face to face, every tear will be wiped away. But until that day, we wipe away the tears from the eyes of others and help to carry their burdens.
Jesus is the ‘God who sees’ and has His eye on the poor, the widow, the orphaned, the fatherless, the bereaved. At the heart of Christ’s ministry, He saw people, met with them, and addressed their needs one-to-one. At the heart, it was the deep, spiritual needs that He was unmasking. We all need Jesus. He is close to the broken-hearted. He binds up wounds. He restores souls.
Be like Jesus by walking with people on the road of isolation and struggle. Stop what you are doing to really listen to their needs. Be attentive to spiritual needs, as well as physical and mental concerns. Journey with them. Ask the Lord to help you by His Spirit to know how to help those that you do know about. Be open-handed and let Jesus lead you to the places where most of society turn their backs.
Roll up your sleeves, saints!
Ruth Clemence – Writer and Blogger 