A woman is crying tonight. She has been up since five in the morning with bags of tiredness hanging from both eyes. She is exhausted when she wakes up, and barely able to carry on by the evening. Every day is the same routine. Get up. Get showered. Get dressed. Make the morning drinks for her and the man she married. Get the kids up and ready for school. Feed the pets. Make lunches. Say goodbye to her spouse as he drives away to work. Take the children to school – each child with their own individual needs and challenges. Get back home. Begin the washing, the ironing, the cleaning. Go out and run errands for elderly neighbours and relatives. Get the groceries.
Carrying the weight of the shopping with arms of strength which have been molded and shaped from holding her children tightly, she struggles to open the front door as groceries hit the floor. Another day. Another hard, tiring day. She has been slipping for a while in doubt, worry, anxiety, fear, loneliness, regret. Is she beyond the grace of God?
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see her? Do they even understand what this woman is going through?
Could anyone realise how unhappy she has become? She is frustrated at herself, her choices, her mistakes, her failings. She has faith, but even that feels as if it might break under the strain of the pressure she feels. Blood pressure rising. Depression slides in. Head in hands. Sorrow building.
The man that married her cannot see her for who she is, in all her loveliness and kindness. He fails to appreciate who she is and all that she does. If he gets his way, he is content. She obeys him and he feels respected. If she opens her mouth and utters words of honesty, hurt and truth of how she is feeling and why, he is quick to get into a fiery rage and to tell her that she needs to change. Words that pierce her heart. Tear her down. Break her remaining self-esteem. She is made to feel low so that he can feel superior. He reminds her of all the things he does for her. She says nothing. Because he does not hear her. How could he when the abuse churns from his stomach and is spat out at her? Years of abuse eroding her confidence, her uniqueness, her personality.
Shattered in mind, body and spirit. Crushed. Alone. Friends that seem far away. Family further away still.
‘Why?’ she utters under her breath. She questions the God that she has believed in from her youth.
Wrapped in a tangle of shame she listens to the lies of evil. Tears roll down her cheeks as she slumps on her bed in despair.
The devil wants to trap her, entice her and steal her joy. He wants to make her doubt in the God who will always love her, despite her sin and wrong-doing. He wants her to believe that she is beyond saving, that she is worthless and no good. The devil is the enemy – the exact opposite of the Lord Jesus who died for her and saved her from the enemy’s clutches.
She is a new creation. She is precious. She is so wonderful.
A woman is crying tonight. Comfort her. Pray for her. Tell her she is fearfully and wonderfully made. There is hope. It is not found anywhere else except in the arms of our loving and merciful God. He hears her cry. He binds up the wounds of the brokenhearted (Psalm 147:3). Let us love her like Jesus and carry her to Him – His yoke is easy and His burden is light.
No matter how hopeless a situation seems, God’s grace goes deeper still. His love covers us. Though our sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow (Isaiah 1:18). We are covered by the blood of the sacrificial lamb – Christ Jesus, a sinless sacrifice, the atonement for our sins. We are washed clean because of Him. We cannot be separated from the love of God.
For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39
The LORD is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. Psalm 145:8
You are so loved. The Lord is near.
2 thoughts on “When Life Gets Too Much”
This a wonderfully insightful post – having suffered from depression I can really relate to this and the beauty of the God who gently lifts us 🙂
Thank you for your comment Tania and I am so encouraged by your words of how God can lift us out of the darkness 🙂
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