Many of you will not know this, but I have been struggling with persistent low moods, worry and anxiety for several months. I have found myself getting angry and irritable at some pretty silly things and have had several days where I have felt completely overwhelmed.
This week, after much toing and froing, I paid a visit to the GP. Despite all that I’ve been feeling, I once again know it to be true that God is with me in this season.
On my way to the GP I sang ‘God my rock’ by Paul Baloche and Brenton Brown (listen to it below).
When my heart is overwhelmed
I will look to You alone
God my rock, God my rock, God my
rock
You will stand when others fall
You are faithful through it all
God my rock, God my rock, God my rock
In the blessing, in the pain
through it all You’ve
never failed me
You are the strength of my heart
You are the strength of my heart
I can rely on You, I can
rely on You
You are the joy of my life
You are my song in the night
There is no one as true
Jesus I trust in You
When I’ve struggled to believe
You have not let go of me
God my rock, God my rock, God my rock
Carried through the darkest storms
You have held me in Your arms
God my rock, God my rock, God my
rock
I am following the advice of the GP and getting a bit of extra support which I am thankful for.
Why am I sharing this?
I write this blog to point people to Jesus Christ and that includes times of struggle. Just because I’m a Christian doesn’t mean that I have everything figured out, I will have a problem-free existence and I am immune from suffering. Far from it. However, I have an unshakable hope, a firm foundation and a source of strength in my weakness that I have come to know time and time again. God is with me.
Another reason for sharing this is since Jonathan has been born, I have really struggled with my confidence (I have never been the most confident for those who know me well!). This has meant I have found going out places extremely challenging – however, I do love being at home with my son – it’s great fun! I have often felt there was something wrong with me as I see other mums taking their babies everywhere and anywhere several times a week. It’s not been easy, but I am stepping out day by day in faith and going at my own pace, rather than trying to keep up with the Jones’ (or Kardashians). I am hoping it will bring some understanding as to why I haven’t been as social or seen out and about as much. I am hoping to get some counselling to help me through some of this.
Thirdly, if you are struggling with your mental health, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help. There is a lot of good support available that can make a difference.
My final reason for sharing this is I have noticed that so many people are busy. I get it. Life can be extremely busy. However, sometimes I think the message people need to hear is ‘slow down’. Stop trying to keep up with everything and everyone else. As it’s World Cup season, I can use the phrase ‘keepie-uppies’ to describe what life can be like. The ball (our life) is being kicked from one foot to the other for as long as possible without touching the ground. Often, we are so busy keeping up with various things that we never touch the ground so we end up battered around from one thing to the next without ever slowing down.
Maybe that’s just my experience, but I think someone else out there needs to read this and just slow down. Join me in this pursuit of not striving to keep up. Sometimes life can be busy, but even then it’s important to stop, reflect and let the Lord refresh you.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28
I am being more intentional about slowing down, not keeping up. This has included:
- not spending as much time on social media
- not putting pressure on myself to complete x,y,z and the rest of the alphabet in a day
- being more intentional in looking at my beautiful boy growing up
- spending time in the garden appreciating the beauty
- making time to write because of the joy it brings
- saying ‘no’ to things and putting boundaries in place to protect my time and my mind
- enjoying the quiet times
- praying and reading God’s Word which refreshes me daily
- being honest with people and telling them how I am feeling
I encourage you today to slow down with what you’re doing and know that you are dearly loved by God and if you trust in Him, He promises to give you the rest you need.
I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. Psalm 121:1-2
It seems appropriate that the following verses that I come to time and time again are about not being anxious and having God guard my heart and mind – this is what I am holding onto, even now:
‘Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.’ Philippians 4:6-7
An Anchored Hope 
I loved this, Ruth. I am very much in the same place of working with my GP to combat persistent low mood and the need to slow down a bit. Thank you for sharing. x
Thanks for your comment Abby! It’s comforting to know there are others going through the same experience so thank you for your honesty. I pray you are able to find rest and a time of refreshing x
It’s a very busy time with a young baby, Ruth, you do need to be kind to yourself. I didn’t get out that much with my oldest and first especially in the evenings as he would spend nearly all that time feeding. Yes, others do seem to get out more but don’t worry, there’s nothing wrong now with my very bright computer developing son!
This is encouraging – thanks Sheila! 😊