Standing at the kitchen sink washing the dishes and watching the soap bubbles slide down the plates, I had a thought. This is probably the most helpful and comforting thought that has really left its mark on me recently.
I am so loved by God – whether I am doing the dishes or achieving a high-flying noticeable career. His love for me does not increase or decrease based on what I am doing. His love just is. For He is love.
Every so often, I get so wrapped up in my identity as being what I do as a job. It’s the one thing that seems to have a hold on me because everybody seems to be ‘doing’ something. They are known by their role. It’s become such a drain on me that I am sometimes at the point of collapse from the pressure I put myself under for not having this high-flying career in the way that I thought I would. I am a struggling perfectionist who doesn’t want to be one. I have longed to achieve since I started school and still somehow seek affirmation in this manner. It. Drives. Me. Crazy.
Therefore, to have this overwhelming sense of my value and worth being defined by who God is and His overwhelming love for me, my mind has been quieter and it has been beautiful.
I wrote the following the other day as quickly as I could because it just came to me (as words so often do) and felt I had to share it because it might encourage someone out there too.
Those moments when no one is watching – when we are not on social media to the praise, likes and shares of others, when we are up to our eyeballs in dirty dishes, sweeping floors, cleaning toilets…
Those moments when we feel that no one notices our grieving, our hearts ache, our anger, our desperation. Those moments when we try and calculate our worth by our achievements, our weight loss, our looks, our career, our home, our family…
In the times when we struggle to go on, to know the depth of loneliness, to feel like we are nobody.
Right in every single moment – there is purpose and worth to be found.
We can know the embrace of a Saviour who comes alongside us in our weakness.
When we feel so low and alone that even God seems too distant, we can know that His love goes deeper than the deepest pit we find ourselves in; His light shines so brightly that even darkness is not dark to Him.
Nothing can separate us from the love of God.
We need to bring it all to Him – He takes our burdens and replaces it with a garment of righteousness.
By His wounds on the cross we are healed. Healing might look different for each one of us on this earth. Yet we are all suffering from the same thing – sin. Our hearts are sick, but through Jesus our hearts can be restored and made new. Out of the heart, the mouth speaks. Words can tear ourselves or others down but they can become words that speak life, hope and truth.
Words are powerful – but God’s Word can change everything. One heart and one word at a time.
I don’t want to speak words against myself that tear me down and say I am not worthy because of what job I do or don’t do. I want to speak life, hope and truth over myself and over others in order to build them up and encourage them. Our worth, identity and purpose is found in Jesus who loves us more than we can possibly imagine because He is love. That is a reason to rejoice and do the dishes (yes, even the dishes) with a smile.